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Author Topic: Post Here When You Have Nothing To Post  (Read 129826 times)
Anonymous
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« Reply #2730 on: July 17, 2017, 04:06:13 PM »

And e'er shall be.

Amen.
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Anonymous
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« Reply #2731 on: July 24, 2017, 04:44:38 PM »



This is a pretty good prank.
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Anonymous
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« Reply #2732 on: July 25, 2017, 12:52:09 PM »



This is a pretty good prank.


I like it plenty.

Smart, simple, funny, and horrifying all at the same time.
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Anonymous
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« Reply #2733 on: July 25, 2017, 01:24:37 PM »

Yup.
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Anonymous
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« Reply #2734 on: July 25, 2017, 02:45:08 PM »

Here is an article on the origin of the expression "piss like a race horse":

When most horses take a leak, it is a dramatic sight, with the stream typically about one-third to one-half an inch in diameter, creating a veritable “river” of urine that seems to have impressed some wordsmith sufficiently to coin the phrase, “piss like a (race)horse” – today denoting a full human bladder that needs emptied yesterday. Although authoritative sources for the expression’s origins are non-existent, luckily, the tools of the modern world are at our fingertips to try to track down the origin and progression of this rather uncouth phrase.

To begin with, a version of the expression was born sometime just after the mid-20th century. At this point, the combustion engine had long since supplanted horse power for transportation and other work, which is perhaps why there aren’t other variants that include things like “piss like a carriage horse” or “plow horse.”

So when, specifically, is the first documented instance of this expression? It has been claimed that it was in Richard Le Mon’s 1972 poetry collection The Needles’ Balance. However, the somewhat suspect source for that does not provide any information on where in said book this occurs, nor what the exact text is. Further, if this is correct, it would place it a full decade before any more readily verifiable documented instance of the exact phrase. (As no digital version of the book exists and I couldn’t get a hold of a copy (yet), we’ll leave that for now.)

But, in the end, it doesn’t necessarily matter in tracing the ultimate origin of the phrase if The Needles’ Balance was first.  You see, the original expression was not “piss like a racehorse,” but rather “piss like a horse.” The first known documented instance of this appears to be in Issues 6-7 (page 27) of the 1969 New American Review. In it, the following text appears, “the noise of straining tractors, uncles who were proud they could piss like a horse, and who ingested certain liquids to permit them to continue to…”

After this, the phrase “piss like a horse” appeared in numerous works of the 1970s and beyond.

The first instance of specifying a “racehorse,” rather than just any horse, that I could find and verify wasn’t until the 1982 Groundrush by Greg Barron, in which he writes “He unzipped his fly and pissed on the insect. Piss like a racehorse. That’s what Pap would recommend- Pap who loved horses and dogs far more than he loved people.”

As to why the switch from just any horse to a racehorse occurred, this is anybody’s guess. It has been speculated that the “race” part was included as it implies urgency, hence the meaning of “urgent need to urinate.” However, the first documented instances of the exact expression have the same meaning and usage as the original “piss like a horse”- urinate a massive amount, rather than specifically referring to the pressing need to urinate a massive amount. So it may actually be the other way around, with the meaning shifting to implicate urgency coming later as a result of the already included “racehorse.”

It also has been noted that “racehorse” just sounds better than “horse” in the expression, not unlike a common alliterative variant that has popped up since, “Piss like a Russian racehorse.”

The transition from “horse” to “racehorse” has also been correlated with the fact that in the early 1970s the drug furosemide began to be legalized in horse racing on race day, first in 1974 in Maryland and spreading from there.

The first known use of it in horse racing, however, was about a decade before this when veterinarian Alex Harthill, “Derby Doc,” gave legendary race horse Northern Dancer a dose before the Kentucky Derby. Northern Dancer went on to win by a nose over Hill Rise.

So what does this have to do with horses’ urinating and why was it given to Northern Dancer and then many, many other race horses since? Furosemide greatly reduces the incidences of exercise-induced pulmonary hemorrhaging. As such, it became a very desirable thing to give to race horses to curb this potential problem.

More important to the topic at hand is that the drug is a major diuretic; a horse given this expels massive amounts of urine (potentially several gallons in an hour) relative to their normal output (a few quarts every few hours). The perceived benefit of this is that the horses can be induced to shed some quick pounds before the race and the net effect, besides the major benefit of reducing instances of pulmonary hemorrhaging, is thought to be better race times.

So it has been speculated that the rise of the use of this drug in the 1970s in horse racing may have seen the expression transition from “piss like a horse” to “piss like a racehorse” – the latter expelling drastically more urine directly before races when on furosemide than their non-doped up brethren. From there, the expression evolved to not just mean the act of expelling a massive amount of urine, but more commonly used today to imply the urgent need to do so.
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Anonymous
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« Reply #2735 on: August 06, 2017, 06:20:52 AM »

I like it plenty.

Smart, simple, funny, and horrifying all at the same time.
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Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #2736 on: August 10, 2017, 07:38:02 AM »



Is he crying because he missed the Mexican?
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Anonymous
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« Reply #2737 on: August 10, 2017, 09:29:32 AM »

A boat that looks like this is parked outside my house:



It also looks like this one, which belongs to Leonardo DiCaprio (it even has a helicopter sitting on its afterdeck):



It's not as fancy as Madonna's yacht, which lived outside my house for several days a few years ago, but it's still stomach-churningly conspicuously consumptive.
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Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #2738 on: August 11, 2017, 09:56:55 AM »

A boat that looks like this is parked outside my house:



It also looks like this one, which belongs to Leonardo DiCaprio (it even has a helicopter sitting on its afterdeck):



It's not as fancy as Madonna's yacht, which lived outside my house for several days a few years ago, but it's still stomach-churningly conspicuously consumptive.


I like when the people who own those yachts lecture me about socialism.
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Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #2739 on: August 11, 2017, 01:01:45 PM »

This is the yacht:



You can buy it for a piddling €4,250,000. Or you can charter it for $91,500 a week. It churned away from here this morning. Meanwhile, the evil developer proceeds with his plans to build little cabins right next to my house. I want to murder.
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Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #2740 on: August 12, 2017, 07:44:45 PM »

This is the yacht:



You can buy it for a piddling €4,250,000. Or you can charter it for $91,500 a week. It churned away from here this morning. Meanwhile, the evil developer proceeds with his plans to build little cabins right next to my house. I want to murder.


seed his property with that godzilla grass
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Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #2741 on: August 12, 2017, 08:46:20 PM »

No need to. He's desperately trying to get rid of it. Had a guy hacking it back and then burning it last week (very close to my house) and next year he plans to douse it with Roundup. It's a battle he can't win, but simply mowing regularly can keep it at bay, so he'll more or less get his way.

Strings have been laid indicating the location of the first cabin. It's very close to my house, though at least slightly off to the left instead of smack in front of me. It's awful, and I'm simmeringly distraught about it all. Oh well.
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Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #2742 on: August 13, 2017, 03:32:46 PM »

Move the strings an inch a day.
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Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #2743 on: August 13, 2017, 05:38:41 PM »

Good idea but hard to carry out. I'd have to do it in the dark, and the ground is treacherous.

When I was little, I cast many successful spells to get snow days. The other night, I decided to see if I still have my magical powers and cast one to prevent the cabins being built. My request may not have been sufficiently specific, though, so if WWIII starts, you can blame me.
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Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #2744 on: August 14, 2017, 02:53:23 PM »

Good idea but hard to carry out. I'd have to do it in the dark, and the ground is treacherous.

When I was little, I cast many successful spells to get snow days. The other night, I decided to see if I still have my magical powers and cast one to prevent the cabins being built. My request may not have been sufficiently specific, though, so if WWIII starts, you can blame me.
Will do!
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